Is there such a thing as an evolving sexuality? A good portion of people are still raised with the idea that sexual orientation is a strict binary, you like men or you like women. It is seen as fairly static, only one of the two options, and unlikely to change over the course of someone’s life. That is not always the case and it’s not strange to explore outside the accepted societal binaries. Why would we do this? Because it’s perfectly natural to have an evolving sexuality and identity. We change our attitudes, feelings, and thoughts about countless other things throughout life. We acquire new tastes and discard older ones. Our sexuality and sexual preferences are no different. There are a number of different sexual orientations that may speak to us. What calls to us may also change throughout our lifespan.
John Lennon said that all you need is love. Love can make any relationship work. Many people have taken this idea to heart and done crazy things in the name of love. It doesn’t always work well. How do we know if it’s real love? We can end up in bad or abusive situations if this is the principle we are following. Trent Reznor acknowledges that sometimes love is not enough. So if love is not the most important building block of a relationship then what is?
Usually, when we are discussing private parts there are the usual words that come up like penis and vagina. There is also a whole list of colorful slang that people use when referring to their genitals. These words can be silly sounding and encourage us to relax when talking about sex. They can also be used with the intent to be insulting or shameful towards someone else.
Do you know why when consent needs to be informed? As conversations about consent continue to become more commonplace, more and more people are looking at sexual consent in new ways that they never have before. Consent is about more than just desire. We are constantly analyzing a number of factors, even subconsciously, to determine what our consent will be. Our answers may change based on the specifics of the situation or the person or people involved. Sometimes we consent to things and find out extra information after. This can be upsetting if we feel that information would have changed our choice before the activity. Being able to make an informed decision is an important piece of the consent process.
How can we help those who have survived a sexual assault? It’s important that we start to move more towards supporting those who have been through such an experience. It’s only by taking these steps that we can start to make real change